Step away from the handcuffs ... ( A parenting tip)

 

 

    Ever have one of those days (You know) The pull your hair out and scream at the wall days ... If you happen to hear the consistent screaming of "I hate you’s, You are not my best friend, I wish you weren't my sister/brother, etc. followed by a whirlwind of back to back "Mom she hit me, she took my toy, she scratched me, well you kicked me" type tirade remarks ONE MORE TIME! 

 

Well, that nifty little picture you see on the side there, was a result of one of those days.

 

After what seemed to be an eternity of what I just mentioned above, I was finally reaching that point of no return mom level (The I'm about to totally lose my shit level)

 

Slowing morphing from the level headed, sweet, here are your cookies type mom you would see in the movie Pleasantville to a mom even “Mommy dearest” Would shake her head at in disapproval.

Something had to be done!

 

In today’s day and age, even a small tap to the bum could have CPS knocking on your door in an instant. Yelling, threats of taking toys, cookies etc. to even standing in the corner was just not working. Not for this. I was at a loss. I just didn’t know what to do.

 

Thinking back, remembering all those adorable posts of (husbands, kids, wives, etc. wearing signs saying just what it was that they had done wrong) The ones you can see being post everywhere, from Facebook, to twitter, Mobli, and every other Social network out there. A light bulb flashed. *Embarrassment* as a kid I NEVER wanted to be punished in front of my friends.

 

I was on a mission … This bickering was going to stop, and I knew now just how I was going to do it. I marched to the toy box, grabbed Erin’s (9, pictured above) Hand cuffs from last year’s cop costume, then grabbed a paper and marker and set about my task. The entire time, still listening to girls bicker away.

 

I called them in with a smile on my face … (amused) by the look of uncertainty on their faces. You could tell they were wondering why I had a huge smile on my face when they knew I was getting angry.

 

I told them politely to sit on my bed, and they listened without speaking the question in their minds. “What is momma up to?”  

 

I slapped the cuffs on them both so they were stuck together, Placed the sign on them and stared them in the eyes. “You two are going to learn to get along!” I said content with the punishment prescribed.

“This isn’t going to work mom … I hate her!” Erin replies with her too old for herself attitude. “I know … I had no doubt that making you guys hold hands with signs wasn’t going to work!” “That is why I have this!” I pulled out my phone, snapped the incriminating photo. And then gave them a  warning “If I hear any more fighting from you two, I promise with my whole heart … I will post this to Facebook and tag you in it!” The crying immediately began, so I took it upon myself to take a less angry … a more this isn’t fair toned faced pic for my posting. I took off the cuffs and signs and sent them on their way with one last note of “I mean it.”

 

For the next few moments I heard nothing … and really was quite pleased with myself. But then my mind started wondering if I had in fact gone too far. Was that mental abuse? I justified it with the fact that it had worked. I had accomplished what I had set out to do, and now I had something that worked and could use again in the future. Even if the only worked for a day, it would be a day of peace I knew I could get.  

 

I started hearing mumbling. Probably ten minutes after I sent them about their day. I rolled my eyes, sure that this was going to be a start to another outburst. I tiptoed my way to their door and listened carefully. (With my girls) You need to know exactly what is going on, before they come to tell you. Because either side you hear is drastically embellished.

 

To my surprise, they were not fighting … The whispers of disdain I had heard were about me. Here they were, my two wonderful daughters getting along, not fighting but plotting against me. They had found a common ground. Something they both agreed on. Just sucked it was how much they thought I was mean, or as my (6 Avery Pictured above) would put it, “The worst mom ever.”

 

And now … Unfortunately only after I gained title of worst mom of the year. I had it! I found the solution to my problem. It wasn’t corners, threats, or black mail photos … It was distraction. (At least in the sense of when they are arguing together)

 

Sometimes being a parent means you have to stop what you are doing and interact. Children are still very much being molded into who they are and who they will be. And at times of high emotion, need a little help keeping things intact. Trust me, I know how annoying it is to stop what you are doing to intervene. But for the sake of your sanity it’s a must.

 

I’ve found that if I just stop what I am doing for the five minutes or less time it takes to put them on a task of something they can do together, I have a lot less stress and it’s quieter to enjoy the things I would normally be listening through the fuss through.

 

DISTRACTION IS KEY!

 

(Small other tip) If watching a movie is your choice of distraction – Make sure they sit on separate seating places! (I learned my lesson here) They will focus on who is on their side of the cushion, whose feet are on who, etc.

 

Now if I could just learn the “Holy Grail of how to’s … To get my daughter to eat her chicken!” Anyone out there have any tips on that?

 

If you happened by this blog, I hope you enjoyed it. I hope that it helps you in the future or today and that your day today and all days after are no less than good J Thanks For reading xxDee